Weight watchers..again.

Yes, I have joined Weight Watchers for the 4th time. Since I quit smoking, I have put on some expected lbs. Quittting smoking is so worth the few extra pounds but I don't want to keep this weight on. My daily food intake isn't the hard part about losing this weight, it's exercising! I have a really nice gym right here in my complex. It has everything I need and 2 huge tv's. It would take me all of 2 minutes (if that) to walk there. Have I worked out 1 time this week? No. I don't know what it is. I need the motivation, I pray for the motivation. I am eating really healthy, drinking a lot of water but can't workout if my life depended on it! Tomorrow is my first WW meeting, maybe that will inspire me. I like being accountable to others, that just might do the trick. One of the resons I want to get to a healthier weight is my hubby and I want to get preggers this summer. I want my body to be nice and healthy to keep my baby safe. Having Lupus will make it a high-risk pregnancy as it is. I don't want to have anything else working against me. That is one of the hardest parts of having Lupus right now. I can't just go and get pregnant. I have to be off certain meds, I can't be going inti flare ups (which I haven't been!YAY) I just pray every night that God have His hand in this and what is meant to be will be. Please keep me in your prayers, it helps!!

Save those who can't save themselves!!

I am a huge animal advocate. I love animals, all animals and I believe no animal should live in harm, torture or un-liveable conditions. I think animal testing is disgusting and will buy only cruelty-free products. Thinking about animals in pain and no one there to care for them just kills me. It is so unfair and the people who abuse animals should be in jail...all of them!

Good at being me!

I thought I had to have a career or special hidden talent to count on this earth, to have a purpose. I was so wrong! I have been evaluating my life the past few months, what I am good at, what I am not so good at. Some days it would bring me happiness, others it just made me sad. i couldn't figure out what I am meant to do. Then it hit me. For today, for right now I am supposed to be just me. I was meant to be the oldest sibling to 7 other children. I was meant to have my daughter at 17 and learn the love of a mother at a young age. I was meant to marry my husband Bobby. I was meant to have the friends I do, that I cherish so very much. God doesn't make mistakes. I am perfectly imperfect in His eyes. Money and possessions don't make me, the people I love and who love me is what is important. The other night I went out with 5 of my girlfriends, I had not seen most of them since my wedding in August. As we were waiting for our movie (No Strings Attached...it was amazing!! Go see it!!) I was looking at all my friends and thinking how blessed I am. Why did God put these wonderful women in my life? I can't question why me, it just is. I need to accept what God has blessed me with and love and live the very best I can. Not to say I don't need to challenge myself or learn new things but I can say now I am happy with being good at being me.

I Quit Smoking!!

Actually I quit last Monday, Jan 3rd. It has been fairly easy, I was soo ready! I am committing this year to bettering myself in every way...inside & out! You can follow my journey @  http://www.facebook.com/pages/Smokefree-Stephanie/183965284965098

Having Lupus, smoking has not helped anything. I told myself it was ok since I don't drink, I need some sort of outlet of stress. Stupid, I know. Now my outlet is walking ,blogging...anything that is positive. For the first time, in a long time I am doing something good for me and sticking to it. No more talking...all walking!!

Wish me luck!!

Sick Girl Quitting Smoking....

Well it's that time of year again.... New Years..time to decide what we will quit, do more of, change and organize. Every year until this one was the same. Get healthy, lose weight. This year I am changing it up a little. I have decided to quit smoking. I decided also not to quit on the 1st...so cliche. I quit on the 3rd instead. I have great reasons to quit.... 

1. My health. ( I have Lupus and smoking doesn't help anything, that's for sure!)

2. My family..I have a beautiful 16 year old daughter and my husband. We just got married in August and are newlyweds. He smokes and I am hoping he will want to quit once he sees me do it!

3. My husband & I want to get pregnant this summer! A new baby is way more exciting then smoking :)

4. My best friend's father had a heart attack the night before Christmas Eve and he smokes. That scared me!

5. For me!! To feel better, smell better and have an overall feeling of healthiness!

Yes! These are all wonderful reasons to quit and I did! 3 days so far. I am using the patch for the first few weeks an lots of gum! Smoking while I drove was the most I smoked. It was like my car wouldn't turn on if I didn't have a cigarette lit. Now I chew gum or suck on peppermint disks. It has helped so much.

One big encouragement is I am involved with smokefree women.gov. I am a part of their campaign. Not only for support but maybe, just maybe one woman will be inspired and quit also.  All the support I have received so far is amazing! My husband is getting in the shower the second he gets home so I don't have to smell it. I have washed all my clothes that wreaked like an ash tray, taken my coats to the dry cleaners and washed my hair. Now I just need to wash my car and air out all my purses. It's amazing how yucky they smell... I never noticed before. I love being able to smell my perfume at the end of the day and have my hair still smell like my shampoo. It feels good to something positive and stick to it! I have a lot to celebrate right now... I will also being turning 3 in my sobriety on January 13th. A lot is good right now, 2011 jus might be a wonderful year! I plan on it. I will make it a great year, I will do my best in all I do and I just might have to kick the name "Sick Girl". Let's see what this year brings! Good luck to you all on your New Years resolutions!

"You're perfectly content sailing along on cloud nine! The source of your bliss could be that new person in your life. Are you passionately, intensely, wonderfully in love? You can yield to the magic. Let it bring out the positive parts of your personality, but keep your wits about you all the same!"

Still searching...

I am coming to the conclusion that I am good at taking care of others. I know that it doesn't sound like something only "special" people can do but it is a little different for me. I don't mind going out of my way for others. I always put myself in "their" shoes and that makes me want to help. I want my family and friends to know that if there is anything they ever need they can count on me, no matter what! There lies the problem..."no matter what". My husband goes crazy when he sees me run out the door early morning / late night to help someone. He feels I get taken advantage of a lot. I had to discover my boundaries with people, everyone had different boundaries in my life depending on what they need from me and how it will inconvenience me.
Now looking into another way of taking care of someone, when they are ill. I think if I didn't have Lupus I would be a nurse. Having been in hospitals myself so many times i think I would be great at it. I have learned compassion for the ill through my own illness. Things that would gross out others (throw up, poo etc.) doesn't bother me. When you have to have someone lift you off the toilet because you are so sick and can't get up yourself you learn a whole new level of humility. It embarrassed me to no end at first (it was my mom helping me). But then, when I realized it was not my fault that I was sick and that I had to use the bathroom it just became a reality to me. It also made me realize that I wouldn't mind helping others do the same thing. I understand how it feels to not be able to do everyday things such as getting up and down off the pot. Maybe I am just compassionate... I know it's not a talent but it makes me feel warm and happy knowing the happiness it gives me helping others.

If any of you out there have any ideas of how to help me find what I am good at... let me know...i could use the help